Good morning. Today I get a vasectomy. My days of making babies are over. I’m very fulfilled and happy with the incredible people my kids have grown up to become. The individual little human beings who I consider very lucky to have in my life. People who I cannot wait to spend more time with in this world and watch as they continue to live and grow. Truly, it was a completely unexpected and amazing time in my life to become a dad and not something that I had planned on doing when I was still in school. But I am so glad those kids became the absolute best of me.
There was a time five years ago when I thought I would want to know what raising a kid with Nicole would be like. I bet having someone as similar to me with whom I communicate so well would be a completely different experience - a really amazing one. She doesn’t want to have kids at all and now that I am 43 years old, I know that I do not currently want to have a baby tomorrow and be raising another child until I am 61 years old. I want to spend the next 20 years of my life writing, creating things, and those creations will not be more babies. I took today off from work for this and then will be working from home for the next three days. I hope that was the right move. There’s just a lot of crap to do at work, but I can’t really afford to take more time than that.
My knee. Yesterday the knee started hurting and then swelling. It is now swollen decently and it is difficult to bend. I’ll be keeping it elevated for the rest of the week, so I think I’ll be OK soon enough. Just not how I want to be recovering from my procedure. After the vasectomy is done, I can finally take four ibuprofen and begin to heal.
In one hour, a man I have never met will be numbing up my balls, and then snipping something in there. They’re going to be completely sore - so sore and sensitive, but it will force me to stay on the couch with my feet up. It’ll be nice, maybe? I can get some other writing assignments from the Artist’s Way done in the meantime. I’ll be tempted to work, but don’t do it. That’s not the vibe. I need to rest.
I also took my blood pressure medication last night, and I feel so lethargic and tired. Is that how I am supposed to feel for the rest of my life? Just completely tired all of the time? No thanks.
Did you know there is a companion podcast to this blog? Check out The Bus Stop on Apple Podcasts, Google, probably other places or you can even just listen here: https://chaseroper.substack.com/podcast
Good luck and be well. I'm sure they won't snip anything they're not supposed to.
Also I'm 52-years-old and have a three and five year old so eff you